I though that your story was soo cute!! I loved the voice acting and that a lot of your words was related to cats. And overall, amazing work.

I though your storyboard was fantastic!.I really like how D&D became the activity the siblings could all play together with daddy cat DMing, what a sweet cat family! I thought the animation of the storyboard was awesome, from the all the different actions to the great expressions on the characters faces really brought the story to life. Loved all the cat D&D pins as well, for me they landed… on their feet! Great job.

I love your story. D&D and cats? What more could you ask for. I really like how you showed their relationships in real life and in the game and how they mirrored one another. You also did great work with your drawings and story. The characters are relatable and engaging and the fact that they become closer for it is such a sweet ending.

My one critique is that the dad doesn't look like an older cat but apart from that good work!

I really enjoyed how you have the game/imagination view and the real world battle map. I love the imaginative monsters, especially the vacuum cleaner. Extremely clever, great drawings, cat puns, and story. Congratulations!

I loved it.
I think that the design of the characters when they are in the game would be good to give them more personality.

Hey Kristen,

I’m still very much impressed by your story on how clear, but especially how compelling it is! I really had a blast watching it a second time with the improvements that you’ve made. Your character developments are well structured, in which the smallest sister really stood out. Furtastic! Also, your drawings / compositions have a very good read, they make sure that the story is being told visually clear as well.

I really admire that you’ve been able to apply improvements to quite some sequences. It definitely shows that you’ve taken my and other feedback seriously. The story already worked very well, but these last changes made it work fantastically!

My biggest doubt in your previous version of the story was when the big fight was taking place with the needle creature. It felt a little bit rushed in terms of the change in the smallest sister’s motivation. She first didn’t want to fight the monster, but her motivation changed quite abruptly. In this version though, you solved this problem perfectly. Not only did you extend that sequence, but you also put in extra emotion by showing the three in the real world, and seeing their struggle play out even better.

I’m still so happy to see that the youngest, most reluctant kitten of the three really develops her own voice and strength while playing the game, which every time puts a huge smile on my face. Stellar job!

I really hope that you’ve enjoyed your time during the Xperiential program. It was great to talk to you, and great that we’re connected on Discord to continue our conversations!

Hi Kristen! I am so so impressed by what you've made and happy to see it finished :)
This was such a charming story to follow these eight weeks and your characters are very endearing.

Here's some observations I loved from this:
- You did a great job in your first 10 seconds of establishing character - from Storm's lighting bolt scar, Luna's aloofness as she knocks over a vase, and Snowflake hiding in a boot
- The dialogue (and puns) in this story really add to the comedy and drama - I'm particularly a fan of how the cat dad introduced the game with "only the coolest cats can play this game" as it really captures the tone of trying to get the kids interested in playing
- The vignette around the in game sequences work as a great cue to that we are in a different - imagined- world
- I like how the kittens making their own game pieces wasn't the solution they needed - that it didn't suddenly fix their teamwork problems
It's also interesting how Storm and Luna have PCs that match their personalities, but Snowflake's doesn't - and how this is a secondary conflict to the story with her learning to overcome her fears and jump into action
- I also like that the scene where the sisters talk to Snowflake is set outside of the fantasy world, since it's a real problem she has

There's so many visual gags, I couldn't list them all, and when the music kicked in a laughed. Your work has solid comedy without taking away from the serious moments.
It's message of teamwork is also strong, along with what I view as a secondary message that art and fiction are ways to build community and overcome personal hurdles

Hi! Great work on this delivery, you can be proud! At first I was a bit afraid that the different personalities of the characters wouldn't come across, but after watching your reel this is gone. Good job! 🐱🎲

Will you further develop this into an animated short?

Hey Jelle! Thanks for the kind words! The point of this was mainly to creat a good storyboard to put into my portfolio so that I can apply to storyboarding jobs easier. I’m going to continue to make this shine as much as I can, but I’m happy that I finally got a story down!

Hi! I’m so glad to see your final submission!

I love your character design, the cats are soo adorable! When I was a kid I used to fight with my brother a lot, so I immediately identify with the kittens! I like that although they are kittens, they have the same problems and little fights that we have.
It is always difficult to admit that we are not capable of doing something, or that we are afraid of it. The fact that the kitten accepts that in front of his sisters, at the risk of being made fun of, but instead of doing that they decide to support him, demonstrates very well the personal growth of all of them.

Congratulations on finishing the Xperiential program!

BIG HUGS
Your work is cool, and your sense of wonder and excitement and "we've done it and learned!" is nice and uplifting :)

Focusing on the newer and/or really amazing things: (I've come back to your story quite often, so repeating feedback is a risk :) )
At 3:35, the admitting fear (and what she's afraid of) is incredibly nice. The "how could I know I could win" is also good.
The sad frowns when she still doesn't dare is heartwarming; and "getting grabbed but only talking about upsetting their sister" is too.
BOOM punch to the gut WHIII
:)
The interaction and moodswings at 5:00 remain cool.


Congrats and thanks a bunch for all you've done! ^^

Your story is very polished and well done! I really like how you can tell which kitten is which based on their distinct character design. The voice acting for each cat was top notch :) I am glad that I got to see this story develop; it is amazing!

I totally agree with you Ariana! Especially with the voice acting, it did a lot in terms of distinguishing the three kittens from each other. Didn't think of that, great!