Hi! I really like what you have submitted for your story board. I feel like the art style matches well with the tone of the story and I felt like you did a good job focusing on a very relatable theme for Laura's story. I like the imagery of paths not taken behind a golden door and how in your description Laura finally takes the leap to make the move to California. Great job!

Love how the visuals tell it all! Hats off to you!

Your visuals are beautiful! The line work, composition, and tones really lead the eye clearly to their focal point and each have a good amount of key info shown. Your expressions and poses are really clear and emotive. I rooted for the character and was intrigued with why she’s unhappy looking out of the car window while her fiancé seems to care for her. Your script was really clear and helped me understand some parts, also giving nice context for this scene:)

I found the order of events confusing and a bit overwhelming. I was taken out of the story a bit by the falling rocks as i didnt know where they were coming from. Maybe you could show rock around her somewhere before it falls, or it cracking above her from the outside (like looking into her mind symbolically)? Otherwise, you could replace the rock with something else which ties into a transition between her looking out the window to the door? I think slowing the pace would also give time to fully understand each point.

I’d love to see more of your character and your art style! And i like your message about taking a leap/risk and going for it, very relatable and positive!

Just for excitement over your work: it would be so cool if you tied in the golden net with earlier hints at what it’s made of (like family or fiancé or achievements etc.) e.g. bits of gold appear subtly along the way so the end is super satisfying. Like a literal golden thread hehe

Hi! Thanks for sharing your work with us even if it's not the final version!

I love the drawings, I think they are totally amazing and I would love to see an entire storyreel with this wonderful amount of detail. The expressions of the characters are very well done!

What confuses me a bit is the sequence of the door, at first I didn't know very well what was happening until I read it in the description. The change from the car to the door is very sudden. Perhaps, you could use a transition where one image dissolves into the other, as well as blur the edges of the image to give the feeling of flashback (or Laura's mind).

Good luck with the story!

Hi Team! Congratulations on making it to the end of the course! I think there is so much potential to your story, and think that there is quite a lot of world building that could be explored. I really enjoyed your illustration style, and I loved the shape of your main character’s eyes. She had a very thoughtful look and great expressions. I’m glad you included the script for your story, because I think that it is easy to see you had quite a compelling story in front of us. I think including a narration track would have helped considerably. The pacing of the story edit is pretty fast, so it’s a little hard to follow along with the story. Otherwise, I would love to see where the story goes and more of that wonderful illustration style.

I love your script, I think the message and theme of your short are short and sweet, it's something we are all scare to do at multiple points in life. Your visuals are also very well polished! I did get a bit confused when it came to the rocks crumbling through in her "visions" since they appear to come out of nowhere (I do also think that's probably the point of the rocks). Nevertheless, you've got something great here, nice work!